Week 13: I Once Was

in lonesome darkness

Week 13: I Once Was

the exile waits in lonesome darkness

I Once Was

I once was

but am no longer

that curious child

innocent and devious

sun blistered shoulders

pinewood derby trophies

blonde hair and mislaid eyes

lanky and happy and awkward

unknown to the world and to myself

drifting through time like a hapless cloud

waiting around like an extra on the set of my life

trapped inside other people's hopes but dreaming of being                         a person

Description: This poem is a nostalgic yet unsettled reflection on lost childhood and emerging selfhood. Through a collage of concrete memories and emotional descriptors, it traces the distance between who I once was and who I have become. The poem captures the ache of invisibility and the feeling of living on the margins of one’s own story, ending with a poignant longing not just to belong, but to fully exist as a self apart from others’ expectations.

Reflection: In what ways did you feel seen and unseen as a child? How were you shaped, both positively and negatively, by those early memories? Who will you choose to be now that you are an adult with agency and freedom to choose your future?

GO TO: WEEK FOURTEEN